(The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

Read & download The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)

The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)

The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1) Characters é 106 By a tank tread is the least of her worries The government never does anything without an ulterior motive Jake could be the key to successor just another bad day at the office for the ZeroesProduct WarningsContains explicit language intense action and violence rampaging zombie hordes a heroine with an attitude and flamethrower Special Forces commandos ninjas apocalyptic necromancer capitalist machinations absurd parody and mayhem self deluded humor irreverence geek humor mutant cats low brow comedy and banana kiwi flavored gelati. What do you get when you have a pyromaniac fire wielding woman a wannabe nudist werewolf a purple skinned gay demona medic ninjaa royal vampirea deranged small animal controlling mage Oh and a depressed succubus You get the Zero Dog Team of Sienna Hotel BadassMeet Keith Melton author of some funny shitIt s not everyday that I laugh and giggle throughout a novel Especially a novel about world domination by way of zombie labor laws and jello Yesreally The evil overlord Jeremiah Hansen has major plans to take over the gelatin industry from there World domination Some of the funniest lines were from Jeremiah s grandiose plans He even hires an image consultantsecond in command Seriously They drive a school bus You ARE insaneYou said something like that already He shook his head Evil and insane are two completely different things I have evil tendencies It s a disorder and Let s face it Evil people need love too So be it I guess I ll let you have your true love for dinner Followed by Let her eat JakeThe Zero Dog Wars is a book that is not serious It s funny It s a parody of the supernatural It s gory and silly with a few serious er moments It s nothing like Blood Vice I thought the band of misfit mercenaries were surprisingly well written Not to say I didn t think Mr Melton didn t write well but with a comical book you just never know how the characters will end upRafe the resident Nudist WerewolfRafe I said Get some clothes on What if my destined mate walks past She won t recognize me if I hide the wangSarge eyed him I suggest you do as the captain asks Otherwise I ll be forced to strip down and shame your earthworm Captains Andrea and Jake were cute and laced with sexual tension I enjoyed how things played out with them and the end felt right I hope to see of this world It seems that Keith left it open for booksSpeaking of Andrea she was a nice blend of kick ass meets I forgot to insert my foot in my mouthIf you need a laugh like zombies and witty repartee and sibling like banter then this book is for you

Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB Â Keith Melton

The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1) Characters é 106 The first bullet is always free After that you gotta payZero Dog Missions Book 1After accidentally blowing up both a client facility and a cushy city contract in the same day pyromancer and mercenary captain Andrea Walker is scrambling to save her Zero Dogs A team including but not limited to a sexually repressed succubus a werewolf with a thing for health food a sarcastic tank driveraspiring romance novelist a three hundred pound calico cat and a massive demon who really loves to blow stuff upWith the bankruptcy vultures circlin. A friend of mine passed me this saying there is a funny heroine with a bunch of misfit paranormal mercenary aka A team style fighting against zombies On a side note there is a hot Special Force Jake Sanders who said heroine is lusting afterI gotta admit humour wise is worth 5 stars but the plot had too much back and forth bantering between the group of mercs and detailed fight scenes for my taste Most of the characters appeared caricature and one dimensional except for the heroine and hero Andrea Walker is the mother hen looking over the group of misfit From the blurb we already knew the group is a concoction for havoc I ve never seen a team with mage demon shapeshifter succubus empath and vampire all roll into one Is pretty funny to see Andrea lusting after Jake Sanders who was assigned by the Homeland Security to oversee their mission At one hand she want to remain authoritative but on the other hand she kept getting distraction by his mere presenceI have ninja skills in one heel of my Jimmy Choo than Hanzo has in his entire repertoire no matter how many times he watches Ninja Brothers of BloodI watched him like a Catholic nun at a junior high dance for any sign of flirtingThat s the most tofu statement I ve ever heard Bland White Tasteless Floats in miso soapJake seems to be by the book kind of soldier who appreciate discipline among the team His first impression of Andrea s team is beyond bad He wonder how they survive this long We get to connect to him better when he open up about his past mission and his motivation But I m not sure why he like Andrea Things seems to move uite fast between them Unfortunately no sex scene for me BummerA shout out to Rafe the shapeshifter wolf who partial towards public nudity Yum Sarge the gay and most sensible person in the team of the team often gave Andrea s the best advise including persuading her to try things out with Jake

Keith Melton  6 Read

The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1) Characters é 106 G Homeland Security throws her a high paying short term contract even the Zero Dogs can’t screw up destroy a capitalist necromancer bent on dominating the gelatin industry with an all zombie workforce The catch She has to take on Special Forces Captain Jake Sanders a man who threatens both the existence of the team and Andrea’s deliberate avoidance of romantic entanglementsAs Andrea strains to hold her dysfunctional team together long enough to derail the corporate zombie apocalypse the prospect of getting her heart run over. Tori s Favorite uote Jesus loves you Everyone else thinks you re an asshole Mandi s Favorite uote Rafe I said get some clothes on What if my destined mate walks past She won t recognize me if I hide the wang Captain Andrea Walker is the fearless leader and frat mom of a hyperactive band of mercenaries named The Zero Dogs A eclectic band of warriors comprised of a sexually repressed succubus a gay demon a decidedly un empathic empath a lazy vampire a wanna be ninja and a werewolf with a penchant for all things naughty When The Zero Dogs are contacted by Homeland Security to find and eradicate a rogue necromancer who is using zombies to make gelatin to eventually rule the world they get then they bargained for in the form of Captain Jake Sanders A professional soldier having Jake on their team is a non negotiable condition to getting the job The pages sizzle with the force of Andrea s attraction to Jake but Andrea doesn t trust him Too many cooks spoil the soup and she s not used to sharing her authority or her team Andrea soon learns she s going to need all her skills to survive this battleTori Keith Melton s The Zero Dog War is a hilarious tongue in cheek satire that pokes fun at the supernatural in fast paced action packed storyline Told from Andrea s point of view the conversation style of writing is a snarky treat filled with hilarious dialogue and some great inner monologue that kept me laughing through out the entire book Our characters are well developed and extremely personable as they round out and provide depth to the storyline Heroes and villains galore all fight the fight to maintain their street creed in this dog eat dog worldAndrea and Jake make great protagonists The yen to the yang describes them best Both highly intelligent and loyal they are warriors foremost Andrea is very vocal in protecting her team and good looking or not she makes no bones about taking Jake out of the picture if he messes with them We don t get as in depth with Jake because this is told from Andrea s POV But what we do get is hubba hubba And we see before Andrea that the war isn t the only thing on his mind Mandi This book had a couple of moments where I laughed so hard my husband came into the room to make sure I was okay I follow Keith Melton on Twitter and his tweets always give me a chuckle so I was very happy that his sense of humor really shines in this book The characters are just so ridiculous but endearing and cute They are the strength of this book There is action enough but it s The Zero Dog team and their nemesis Jeremiah one of many many names he goes by he can t uite nail down an evil name that really makes this book stand out Poor Andrea tries to herd around her team who bicker who are all slobs and who give her such a hard time But they are family and always have each other s backs Another highlight of the book for me is all the acronyms Keith Melton uses probably funnier when read in context so I ll let you discover them on your ownThe Zero Dog War is a funny book with memorable characters Very much looking forward to a second installment My rating BTori If your looking for a fast read guaranteed to have you laughing and snorting then look no further the The Zero Dog War And remember no sparkly vampires were saved to make this bookMy rating B


10 thoughts on “(The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

  1. says: (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB Â Keith Melton Read & download The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)

    Keith Melton  6 Read Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB  Keith Melton Read & download The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1) Funniest UF ever But still w great characters action and a touch of romance I heart it Just go get a copy seriously It's 385 at Samhain You will cry laughing

  2. says: Keith Melton  6 Read (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

    (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton A friend of mine passed me this saying there is a funny heroine with a bunch of misfit paranormal mercenary aka A team style fighting against zombies On a side note there is a hot Special Force Jake Sanders who

  3. says: (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

    (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB Â Keith Melton I am very impressed with this book simply because I laughed until the end I tend to get sick and tired of the humor in most books Jokes get old or are seen pages ahead of delivery One thing I can not tolerate is predictable and tiresome humorWithout the humor this book would still rate a solid 4 stars The story is on the

  4. says: (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

    (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton My random thoughts I’m going to start by saying I loved this book Here’s why The plot is brilliant; we get a lot of very random and interesting things happening throughout the book lots of excellent explosions and fight scenes that weren

  5. says: (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

    (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton I am somewhat unsure of this book It could be urban fantasy but it has no real world building at all just a variety of paranormal creatures thr

  6. says: (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

    Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB  Keith Melton Keith Melton  6 Read (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton Tori’s Favorite uote “Jesus loves you Everyone else thinks you’re an asshole”Mandi’s Favorite uote “Rafe” I said “get some clothes on”“What if my destined mate walks past? She won’t recognize me if I hide the wang”Captain Andrea Walker is the fearless leader and frat mom of a hyperactive band of mercenaries

  7. says: Read & download The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1) Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB  Keith Melton Keith Melton  6 Read

    Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB  Keith Melton Keith Melton  6 Read (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton Oh guys I wanted to open this review with a few of my favorite uotes but that I realized that I'd be uoting the whole damn book if I did that So I'll skip my favorite uotes and move along to the 1001 reasons why you should read this bookDude This book is fuuunnnnnny Like laugh out loud funny Like I was grinning like a fool in a room by myself while I was reading it funny This is a little known fact but on top of rarely crying dur

  8. says: Keith Melton  6 Read Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB  Keith Melton (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

    Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB  Keith Melton Keith Melton  6 Read Read & download The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1) What do you get when you have a pyromaniac fire wielding woman a wannabe nudist werewolf a purple skinned gay demona medic ninjaa royal vampirea deranged small animal controlling mage Oh and a depressed succubus? You get the Zero Dog

  9. says: Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB  Keith Melton Keith Melton  6 Read (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

    (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton I can't tell you how many times I giggled or snorted with laughter reading this book A lot It's very geeky crazy and funEverything is exaggerated blown out of proportions and brimming with snark The Zero Dog War is a parody on urban fantasy books and superhero comics and a very well done one at thatTake for example our supervillain necromanc

  10. says: (The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)) [PDF/EBOOK] ✓ Keith Melton

    Read & download The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1) Download Ü PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB  Keith Melton Keith Melton  6 Read ‘The Zero Dog War’ is the first book in a new paranormal action series from Keith Melton The Zero Dogs are a bunch of paranormal mercenaries There’s the permanently horny werewolf Rafe Shy succubus Tiffany Wannabe ninja Hanzo Furry demon lover Mai Demonic ‘Sarge’ and emotionally stunted empathy Gavin This rag tag team of supernatural’s is lead by pryomancer Captain Andrea Walker It’s up to Andrea to keep th

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  • Kindle Edition
  • 228
  • The Zero Dog War (Zero Dog Missions, #1)
  • Keith Melton
  • English
  • 23 June 2020
  • null